Motorcycle Forum / General / Motorcycles / September 2008

So I woke up this morning with my sinuses draining, my throat aching,
and my head throbbing. Oh joy: a head cold coming on.

After slogging my way through a tasteless breakfast I figured it would
be a good day to clean, oil, and adjust the VFR's chain tension, so I
adjourned to the garage, put the bike up on it's center-stand, and
picked up the toolbox off the workbench intending to place it on the
floor next to the bike.

That's when I spotted a nice healthy Black Widow spider sitting atop
the toolbox about two inches from my suddenly sweaty palm. So I
dropped the box the last foot to the concrete and stepped briskly on
the spider. (Squidge-squidge-squidge.)

Then I got to go locate and retrieve the various sockets that had
somehow leaped out of the toolbox when it sprang open as it hit the
concrete. Several had rolled under a spiderweb-encrusted pile of
lumber in the corner, which meant that rather then reach into the
shadowy recesses I had to carefully move the lumber a couple of pieces
at a time -never putting my hands anywhere that I hadn't first
carefully looked- until the missing sockets eventually turned up.

The rest of the job came off without any more nasty surprises, and I'd
just about decided that the day's excitement was over when it came
time to walk the hounds after dinner.

So my wife and I and the dogs are meandering along through the
sagebrush near our home when I spotted a particularly decorative piece
of hose that someone had unaccountably left lying athwart the trail
just ahead of us. Then I noted that it seemed to be moving.

Then I realised that it was a Red Diamondback Rattlesnake long enough
that his head was invisible in the brush to our right and his (?)
rattles had yet to appear on the left.

We stopped. Rather abruptly. And gave thanks that we don't let the
dogs off-leash during snake season.

Since the dogs were evincing no little interest in the subject of
herpatology as applied to the canine diet, I decided to carpe the diem
and teach them to stay away from snakes. So I grabbed a handy -and
stout- 4' long branch and advanced on the snake expecting him to coil
up and buzz at me.

Nope. Just sat there frozen and tracked me with his beady little eyes.
Probably never seen a human being before and has *no* idea what to do.

In fact, I couldn't get him to rattle at *all* until I picked him up
with the far end of the impromptu snake-stick and pitched him about
five feet down the hillside into a pile of brush.

THAT got his attention, and as he broke into continuous song and the
dogs strained forward in interest I suddenly whacked the ground right
in front of them with the stick and yelled *NO!*  *BAD DOG!* at the
top of my lungs.

They seemed to get the message, and hopefully the snake learned to
rattle when something bigger than it is approaches it closely. The
only *really* dangerous rattlesnake is the one you don't see before
you step on him.

So anyway, now it's 11:51 PM computer time and I'm still sniffling.
I'd like to go to bed. But you see, our yard is *lousy* with cone-
nosed kissing bugs and I'm becoming more and more certain every moment
that there's one waiting in our bedroom that has my name on it.

I think I'll let my wife go to bed first.